Things A Lady Shouldn’t Do In The Presence Of A Man

Here with the help of our friends we are going to disect some few immediate turn offs men see in some ladies.• Farting In Our Presence

Men hate this to the core, they may pretend not to but they really hate when you do it in their presence. If you doubt me, go and ask a man whom you don’t know to tell you what he thinks of a lady who fart or always fart in front of him.



• Eating too much
Whenever you Ladies are in our Presence please try to control your eating habits. Not that we’re too broke to buy you Food but eating without Class just because your indoors is disgusting to say the least!

• Washing of your undies (panties)
Please try to reduce the amount of times you wash your undies in our presence. Forget that popular slang which tends to say that when a man loves you, he can even wash your undies, we’re not that cool with seeing someone else’s undies!

• Talking too dirty
Please, have control of things you say in our presence. Don’t be too naughty when it comes to your language except you want to remain a GIRLFRIEND FOR LIFE!!!!!

• Laughing excessively
Control the length you laugh in front of us. When we’re not around, you can laugh and bring down the roof if you wish. I was talking to a lady and she laughed so loud that she didn’t know when she polluted.

• Always watching movies
If your a Nollywood addict please, for the sake of not receiving any RED CARD, stop giving all your time to once your man is around. We need total concentration when we are talking to you.

• Fighting
Never you fight in front of your man, he may feel that one day you will fight his mother.

• I Too Know attitude
Its very annoying when you always act like you know everything. When we argue about sports,romance,friends etc its cool for you to let us win sometimes as it would do you no harm than try to make sure you POV is the most correct even when its not.

10 Men Christian Women Should Never Marry

My advice stands: Don’t settle for less than God’s best. Too many Christian women today have ended up with an Ishmael because impatience pushed them into an unhappy marriage. Please take my fatherly advice: You are much better off single than with the wrong guy!

Speaking of “wrong guys,” here are the top 10 men you should avoid when looking for a husband:

1. The unbeliever. Please write 2 Corinthians 6:14 on a Post-it note and tack it on your computer at work. It says, “Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?” (NASB). This is not an outdated religious rule. It is the Word of God for you today.

Don’t allow a man’s charm, looks or financial success (or his willingness to go to church with you) push you to compromise what you know is right. “Missionary dating” is never a wise strategy. If the guy is not a born-again Christian, scratch him off your list. He’s not right for you. I’ve yet to meet a Christian woman who didn’t regret marrying an unbeliever.

2. The liar. If you discover that the man you are dating has lied to you about his past or that he’s always covering his tracks to hide his secrets from you, run for the nearest exit. Marriage must be built on a foundation of trust. If he can’t be truthful, break up now before he bamboozles you with an even bigger deception.

3. The playboy. I wish I could say that if you meet a nice guy at church, you can assume he’s living in s*xual purity. But that’s not the case today. I’ve heard horror stories about single guys who serve on the worship team on Sunday but act like Casanovas during the week. If you marry a guy who was sleeping around before your wedding, you can be sure he will be sleeping around after your wedding.

4. The deadbeat. There are many solid Christian men who experienced marital failure years ago. Since their divorce, they have experienced the Holy Spirit’s restoration, and now they want to remarry. Second marriages can be very happy. But if you find out that the man you are dating hasn’t been caring for his children from a previous marriage, you have just exposed a fatal flaw. Any man who will not pay for his past mistakes or support children from a previous marriage is not going to treat you responsibly.

5. The addict. Churchgoing men who have addictions to alcohol or drugs have learned to hide their problems—but you don’t want to wait until your honeymoon to find out that he’s a boozer. Never marry a man who refuses to get help for his addiction. Insist that he get professional help and walk away. And don’t get into a codependent relationship in which he claims he needs you to stay sober. You can’t fix him.

6. The bum. I have a female friend who realized after she married her boyfriend that he had no plans to find steady work. He had devised a great strategy: He stayed home all day and played video games while his professional wife worked and paid all the bills. The apostle Paul told the Thessalonians, “If anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either” (2 Thess. 3:10). The same rule applies here: If a man is not willing to work, he doesn’t deserve to marry you.

7. The narcissist. I sincerely hope you can find a guy who is handsome. But be careful: If your boyfriend spends six hours a day at the gym and regularly posts closeups of his biceps on Facebook, you have a problem. Do not fall for a self-absorbed guy. He might be cute, but a man who is infatuated with his appearance and his own needs will never be able to love you sacrificially, like Christ loves the church (Eph. 5:25). The man who is always looking at himself in the mirror will never notice you.

8. The abuser. Men with abusive tendencies can’t control their anger when it boils over. If the guy you are dating has a tendency to fly off the handle, either at you or others, don’t be tempted to rationalize his behavior. He has a problem, and if you marry him you will have to navigate his minefield every day to avoid triggering another outburst. Angry men hurt women—verbally and sometimes physically. Find a man who is gentle.

9. The man-child. Call me old-fashioned, but I’m suspicious of a guy who still lives with his parents at age 35. If his mother is still doing his cooking, cleaning and ironing at that age, you can be sure he’s stuck in an emotional time warp. You are asking for trouble if you think you can be a wife to a guy who hasn’t grown up. Back away and, as a friend, encourage him to find a mentor who can help him mature.

10. The control freak. Some Christian guys today believe marriage is about male superiority. They may quote Scripture and sound super-spiritual, but behind the façade of husbandly authority is deep insecurity and pride that can morph into spiritual abuse. First Peter 3:7 commands husbands to treat their wives as equals. If the man you are dating talks down to you, makes demeaning comments about women or seems to squelch your spiritual gifts, back away now. He is on a power trip. Women who marry religious control freaks often end up in a nightmare of depression.

If you are a woman of God, don’t sell your spiritual birthright by marrying a guy who doesn’t deserve you. Your smartest decision in life is to wait for a man who is sold out to Jesus.

Whatsapp Update For Android Comes With New Privacy Settings

WhatsApp just got better after it was acquired few days ago by Facebook for just $19 billion.WhatsApp has finally released a new update for Android which brings the much awaited privacy settings that enables you to customize WhatsApp the way you want it.

The new update brings new Privacy options under Account section in Settings. Now, you can finally hide your ” Last Seen”, “Profile Photo” and “Status” from anyone. This has nothing to do with downloading an app on play store to hide your last seen TimeStamp but originally coming from them.
Using the new privacy feature, you can allow everyone to see your personal info (last seen, profile pic and status) or only your contactsornobody.
No more any duke and harry stalking your last appearance on WhatsApp or whatsoever.
This new WhatsApp update is not yet available on the Google Play Store, but you can download the new WhatsApp v2.11.169 update APK file from the official WhatsApp website.

7 Signs She Doesn’t Love You Anymore

In most cases when woman is no longer interested in a relationship she doesn’t want to be the one to end it. And sometimes, women tend to emotionally sign out of the relationship even before they come out and say it is over.

The signs below could mean she is losing connection with you (in which case you should try to reestablish intimacy immediately), or it could also mean she is completely over it and fallen out of love. Whatever the case, it pays to be prepared.
Here are 7 signs your woman is losing interest.

1. Dialing Out: She has not picked up your phone call in a few days, when you normally talk tow to three times a day before. She keeps coming up with different excuses as to why she is ignoring you, but her stories are not satisfactory.

2. She gets secretive: Women are known for wanting to share their stories and experiences with loved ones, especially the man in their life. Have you noticed she has not told you anything personal lately? This could be a sign that she no longer relies or connects with you.

3. Suspicious activities: When she picks up calls from other men while with you, or flirt with others without giving any consideration for how you feel, this could mean she does not respect you or your feelings, and that usually happen when she no longer had feelings for you.

4. Lack Of Physical Contact: She avoids physical contact with you. You cannot even hold her hand without her cringing in disgust. This is a definite sign that something is wrong.

5. No more fighting: This is perhaps the most subtle and the most overlooked. If your relationship has been rocky for some time now (you guys are having lots of fights) and lately she just suddenly stops arguing with you or has nothing to say when a fight comes up, don’t make the mistake of taking this to mean all your problems are solved. Often, women express their feelings with words, so when she stops talking, you should start worrying.

6. She avoids family/friends gatherings: Often times, women feel guilty when they are about to end a relationship and hanging out with your buddies when she knows she is about to break up with you soon will only make her feel guiltier. So she will more likely avoid a situation where she will have to be around your loved ones (friends or family). It is also the same if she tries to prevent you from hanging out with her own friends/family.

7: She doesn’t invite you to share: Just like she would not want to talk to you about her problems/experience, she will also not ask you to talk about yours. She no longer cares if you had a bad day, and when you do talk to her, she probably just give you non-committal responses like nodding and mumbling. She also does not contribute to such conversations anymore.

5 Things Women Don’t Want Men to Know

1. We Are Very Critical of Ourselves – No matter how confident any woman seems, we can be extremely critical of ourselves. No need to mention anything about our weight, our skin, or our bad hair because we are well aware of our so-called “flaws” already. In fact, most of us obsess about these things far too frequently.

2. We Tell Our Friends Practically Everything – We might say that we don’t tell our girlfriends nearly every single detail about our lives and relationships, but we kinda do.

3. Our Weight or Dress Size – Don’t ask how much we weigh, or try to guess. And please don’t try to figure out our size and buy us clothing. If you want to buy us any clothes, take us to the shop. Thank You.

4. How Much We Spend – You really don’t want to know how much our hair, clothes and make-up cost, unless you’re paying of course, then you can know.

5. Most of us are Very Curious – Due to unfortunate past experiences or insecurities, there are some women out there who have been known to snoop through their significant other’s phones and personal mail. We’re not condoning this behaviour, but this is definitely something women don’t want men to know.

What do you think girls? Is there any thing you don’t want that man to know? Share with us in the comments box.

4 Skills You Should Acquire Before Getting Married!

Here are the top soft skills you should acquire before going to the altar.

1. Emotional self-regulation: Young children often get mad, cry, or even hit their siblings. Adults, on the other hand, mostly live their lives in the calm zone. The good news is that adults who get overly emotional, (especially with anger), can learn how to overcome their anger tendencies. If you find that you raise your voice and get mad more than once every several months, or get so mad that you say and do hurtful things, you’ve got some important learning to do.

2. Communication: Talking tactfully, especially when the issue is something that distresses you, and listening in a way that sustains cooperation, are essential to any marriage. Talking in a way that’s complaining, critical, or otherwise hurtful will get you in serious marriage trouble. Dismissing what your partner says, negating what you hear with “but”, or ignoring instead of digesting what you hear, is sure to cause extreme marital woes.

3. Conflict resolution: All couples have differences. Successful couples know how to start with a “his-way” and a “her-way” and end up with an “our-way” that they both feel good about. That’s true whether the issue is a simple one, like what movie to see on Saturday night, or big issues like where to live, how to handle money, and how to keep your s*x life passionate.

4. Positivity: Every time you share a smile, laugh at your partner’s jokes, agree with a comment your partner said, express appreciation, thank your partner for something, or express affection, you are offering “dollops” of positivity. The more dollops you give, the happier you both will be.

7 Interesting Facts About Kissing

Here is the list of some interesting facts about kissing. Probably, some of them are already familiar to you and some will become a good discovery.
1. The insulting slang phrase “kiss my a*s” dates back at least to the year 1705.

2. Lips are 100 times more sensitive than the fingertips. Even private parts don’t possess as much sensitivity as lips.

3. Passionate kissing burns 6.4 calories per minute.

4. The mouth is full of bacteria. When two people kiss, they exchange between
10 million and 1 billion bacteria.

5. A medieval manuscript warns Japanese men against deep kissing during the female climax because a woman might accidentally bite off part of her lover’s tongue.

6. The Christian ritual kiss or “kiss of peace” was used during prayer, Eucharist, baptism, ordination, and in connection with greeting, funerals, monastic vows, and martyrdom.

7. Contraction of HIV through kissing is very unlikely. One woman was infected in 1997 she and the infected man both had gum disease. Transmission was likely through the man’s blood and not his saliva.

10 Ways To Make A Woman Fall In Love With You

After you meet a woman and start dating her, you get to know her better. You probably start feeling closer to her and may even find yourself falling in love. But her feelings may still remain a mystery to you.
You’re not even sure whether you’re doing things right. How can you get her to fall in love with you? Here are 10 ways how to woo your woman, and at the end of it, she’s sure to be crazy about you.

1. Display maturity. It’s always said that women mature faster than guys and are often found complaining about how immature they act. Impress her with the way you deal with situations and your outlook on the whole. Show her how responsible you are about finances, or serious you are about your career. And demonstrate your ability to think clearly and rationally when disagreements crop up or a conflict of interests presents itself.

• TIP: Women love it when a guy takes interest in their likes, dislikes, interests, family, childhood and so many other areas. Talking to her about herself is the best way to make her fall in love.

2. Romance her. Make her feel good by keeping the romance alive in the relationship. You don’t have to spend a whole lot of money doing this. Sure, there isn’t a woman alive who doesn’t adore flowers and gifts, but you can also do things that don’t cost a lot but can still enhance your relationship. Write her little notes or send her a mushy card. Call her up just to tell her you’re thinking about her and can’t wait to see her again. Be attentive and make her feel cherished and truly special.

3. Be faithful. Don’t ever give her occasion to doubt you. Let her know that you have eyes only for her and the rest of the world takes a backseat. Let her sense your commitment to her and your relationship. Being able to trust someone and truly rely on him is a very powerful feeling. So many people profess deep feelings and then cheat on their partners. Don’t just tell her but show her that she can count on you. Women need to feel secure and once that is established, it takes the relationship to a higher level.

4. Time spent with her is precious. Make it clear that you really treasure the time you spend with her, irrespective of what you’re doing together. And prove it! For instance, if she suddenly tells you she’d like to meet you because she’s finishing work early and you had something else lined up, cancel it for her. That doesn’t mean you cater to her to the exclusion of everything else, just that you sometimes sacrifice something you care about to be with her. If she begs you to come see a movie and you had plans with your buddies, do it for her and let her know subtly that you did. She will surely reward you! Women also love it if you do some girly stuff with them like shopping for lingerie, and aren’t afraid of sacrificing your masculinity in the process. It just makes you more of a man in their eyes!

5. Compliment her. You don’t have to go over the top always telling her how good she looks or how gorgeous her hair is or what a lovely outfit she’s wearing. A compliment has more effect when it is sincere, well-timed and, often, out of the blue. While a woman always loves hearing that she’s looking good, you can’t keep telling her that. It will lose its charm eventually. A compliment is valued when there is a surprise element to it. Telling her how witty you find her, how her intelligence turns you on, appreciating how thoughtful and generous she can be, or her gentle nature, all these are deeper compliments, which, when paid sincerely, make the recipient feel ten feet tall.

6. Laughter. Use humor as your biggest ally. If she enjoys your company and looks forward to seeing you again, you’re rapidly becoming an addiction, and that’s just what you’re aiming for. It’s not about making her laugh over your one-liners and finding you hilarious. It’s more about being on the same wavelength and enjoying the other’s sense of humor too. Or finding humor in similar situations or having a favorite serial or sitcom, which you talk about and cracks you up. Finding the same joke funny, or sharing a smile, draws you closer and makes you feel like kindred spirits. It’s a great feeling!

7. Learn what turns her on. And use it to advantage. Find out just the kind of touch that excites her, how she loves to be kissed. Don’t ever push her for s*x or make her uncomfortable by coming on too strong. Let her see the effect she has on you, yet keep a strong rein on your passions if she decides she wants to call a stop to it. Let her set the pace, and ensure she understands that while your desires for her are strong, you will respect the limits she sets. Respect her and her body and she will appreciate you more for it. Women love it when they can see how much they turn you on and yet find you willing to take it slow for their sake. Also, when you make love to her, don’t always kiss her or caress her as a lead up to having s*x. Do it just to make her feel special and because you want to convey that to her, and she will adore you for it.

8. Give her space. Don’t be possessive and make her account to you regarding her whereabouts. Let her know you trust her. Don’t expect her to spend all her free time with you. Let her have her own life too. Often when in a relationship, people make the mistake of spending every waking moment that they can manage together, and in the process, alienate themselves from friends and even lose their identity. Let her be her own person.

9. Be thoughtful. You remember little things she told you, and remind her of it at opportune moments. It may be that she once mentioned she loves having chicken soup when she’s got a cold, and you land up with some when she’s got the sniffles. Or she’s told you how she adores a particular entrée at a popular restaurant and the next time you go there, you order it and surprise her. It makes her feel like you genuinely listen to her and take the trouble to act on it and make her happy.

10. “I love you”. And of course, while showing her should give her the message, there’s a lot to be said for saying it loud and clear. Tell her how important she is to you. You might want to think about when you’re first going to tell her those three words. If it’s too early in the relationship, she might be skeptical that you could feel so deeply so soon. And thereafter, it’s not just choosing the right moment, but making every small moment count. You don’t have to wait only till you’re kissing her, or in bed. Saying it when it’s least expected makes it all the more precious. She might be telling you something and the feeling just overwhelms you – tell her at that instant. She won’t mind being interrupted mid-sentence.

10 Signs You Should Break Up With Your Boyfriend!

Relationships can be tough and knowing when to break up with a BF can be even tougher. So how do you know when you’re spending your time with the wrong guy? We’ve got 10 signs that you should stop hanging on to your beau and kick him to the curb.

1. He’s not a Mr. Nice Guy.
Nice guys should always finish first! Don’t keep a BF who disrespects teachers, acts nasty to parents, calls you names or disses your friends. Trade that meanie for a nice guy and you’ll end up in a much happier relationship.

2. He packs on the pressure.
Your BF should never pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to do, and you should never do anything that makes you uncomfortable. If your BF really cares about you, he’ll respect your decision even if that decision is no.

3. Too much fighting, not enough fun.
Relationships should make you happy, not get you down all the time. If there’s no fun left and all you do is fight, it’s time to either fix the problem or walk away.

4. He hasn’t got the time.
Does he blow off your date nights to hang with his friends, ignore your calls or give you the cold shoulder? If he doesn’t make an effort to set time aside for you, then why are you putting so much effort towards spending time with him?

5. He doesn’t support your goals or have any of his own.
When you tell him about your goal of singing the national anthem at a football game, becoming a veterinarian or getting straight A’s, your boyfriend shouldn’t roll his eyes and laugh in your face. Your guy should never put you down or make you feel like you can’t make your dreams come true, no matter what they are. You should both have your own goals and should want to succeed together.

6. He gets controlling.
Your boyfriend shouldn’t be telling you what you can and can’t wear, where you can and can’t go or who you can and can’t hang out with. Time to say ‘BYE’ forever to that control freak. You are your own person and can make your own decision; you don’t need a boy telling you what to do.

7. He ALWAYS makes you pay.
We’re not saying a guy should pay for you every time you go out; going halfsies is great and it’s even okay if you volunteer to pay for him every now and then. But if he always makes you pick up the lunch tab, buy his coffee or grab his movie ticket, that’s not okay.

8. Drama with your fam and besties.
A guy should always try to get along with the people who are important to you. If he doesn’t care about being nice to your parents or if he avoids being around your friends, then you have a problem. You’re family and friends care about you; if they don’t like your new beau, hear them out! They probably have a good reason.

9. He flirts….with other girls!
Your boyfriend should be flirting with you, not your whole class. Being friendly is okay, but if it goes beyond that, your sweetheart needs to get his flirting under control or it’s time to move on. One more thing: if your BF cheats, kick him to the curb, pronto!

10. He can’t control his temper.
It’s okay to get angry; it’s not okay to yell and curse at someone. And it’s really not okay to throw things or get violent, ever. If your BF can’t handle his anger in an appropriate way, he’s not the right guy for you.

RELATIONSHIPS: 10 Good Questions To Ask When Getting To Know Someone

Here is a list of those important things you should know when getting to know someone, you might not get to ask them directly, but still find a way to know all the answers to the 10 points listed below:

1. Are you married / or do have a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Any studdering, hesitation or giggling is a MAJOR red flag. “Are you single” is a very simple question that should have a very simple answer… i remember this man was trying to approach me, i asked him if he was single… first he giggled (nervous laughter) then he said “why you ask me that”? then he said “yes I’m single”, then he says “i have friends”, translation… “no i’m not single, i have a girl but i’m also a dog”. SMH!!! If a man/woman is single he/she will answer that question with a simple “YES” (with no pause), anything other than that is suspect.

2. What are his/her morals & values?
This one should be HIGH on everyone’s list. If your morals & values are not in alignment with each other, that could be a big problem.

3. How does he/she speak to you?
I have learned that there is something to be said about a man/woman who constantly speaks with a foul mouth around a person they just started dating. It shows a lack of respect. I’m not saying a man/woman can’t ever curse… of course that’s not the case, but if he/she’s saying things to you like “wassup my nigga” or “wassup bitch” or Muthaf*cka this Muthaf*cka that”… he/she is not respecting you.

4. What is he saying about his / her ex? Is he speaking negative about them?
It’s normal to some degree for a person to say certain things about their EX, however if the person you are interested in is ranting with anger and talking very negative about the person whom they were once in love with… that’s a sign they still have issues regarding that situation, and just like they talk bad about that EX, they will talk bad about you.

5. Does he/she want marriage and children?
If you are early 20′s you don’t have to rush these type of questions, but if you are in your 30′s or 40′s you NEED to ask the tough questions early so you are not wasting your time with someone who doesn’t want the same things in life that you want or maybe they want it and you don’t… either way, marriage and children need to be discussed at some point, especially if that’s something you have your heart set on.

6. Do they have anger issues or a quick temper?
I once was out with a guy who screamed at the top of his lungs at someone for getting his order wrong…. being annoyed would be normal, but to SCREAM bloody Mary in a public place is insane… needless to say that was one red flag that i should’ve took heed to. pay attention to Public behavior and quick temper signs, if they act psycho in public, what do you think they will be like behind closed doors?

7. What are their goals?
This is a good question to ask to see if he/she may have a good head on his/her shoulders. I met a man who lived at home with his mom, yet he spent several thousand dollars buying a new gold chain when he should’ve been getting his own place (SMH)! needless to say that was a major turnoff to me and a huge red flag that his priorities & goals were not in sync with mines.

8. Do they have kids, how many? how many mothers/fathers?
If meet a man with 5 kids and 4 or 5 different mothers. Realistically speaking, if a man is spending time & money with his kids like he’s suppose to, how is it possible for him to have time or the finances to date or start a family with someone new? besides that, it could be a red flag that he has commitment issues if he hasn’t settled down with none of the mother of his kids. I don’t like to judge but… No Thanks!!

9. What type of people do they hang around?
They say you are a reflection of the people you choose to hang around. If the man/woman you are interested in is hanging around with people who have no morals and bad character, you need to pay attention to that.

10. How do they treat their Mother/Father?
In most cases, If a person speaks to their Mom/Dad in a disrespectful manner… that’s a sign that they will probably speak to you the same way eventually.

5 Ways To Know If A Woman Likes You

Meeting new women can be a very exciting and nerve-racking experience at the same time.
Wouldn’t it be really amazing if you can skip past the nerve-racking part and enjoy hanging out with her because you know she already likes you?
Well here are 5 ways to know when she’s feeling your vibes.


She makes eye contact: If you haven’t met yet but catch her looking at you then glancing away, then checking back to see if you’re still looking at her … this is a sign, gentlemen! Just make sure she’s actually staring at you

She smiles, tells you her name and starts throwing off physical signals: If she seems to be showing off, fluffing or twirling her hair, extra giggly etc, those are good signs. Also, she tends to ignore the fact that you keep sneaking a peek at her cleavage, heck, she might even position herself for better view. Meanwhile, is she politely shooing away people who drift in to interrupt? That’s fantastic! She’s trying to keep the party to two.

She searches for commonalities: Any. Thing. At. All. During the conversation, she tries to find something you both have in common. It might be as trivial as shared love for the same sweets and sitcoms, or as heavy as your political views. If it starts to seem like you have nothing in common, she can say something like “Wow! I’ve always wanted to try that”, regardless of whether you’re going on about shark-cage diving or a pottery class.
But if she frowns at you blankly, clearly having no clue what you’re talking about, move on.

She touches you: That may mean she touches your shoulder when she leans in to talk or gives you a friendly jab in the ribs. Subtly test waters by letting your hand rest on her knees. She lets it stay there? Score! If she’s taking great pains not to let any part of her body linger near yours or if she recoils abruptly at your touch, even by accident, move on!

She’s taking the interaction to another level by a) clarifying that she’s talking about an ex-boyfriend, not a current one, when she says “we”, b) asking open-ended questions about you that require long answers, and c) dissuading you from leaving and encouraging you to stay with her.

5 Best Tricks To Catch A Cheating Partner!!!

According to a leading internet divorce and separation resource website- 50-60% of committed men and 45-50% of committed women engage in extramarital affairs at some point in their relationships. No, we are not trying to scare you by these statistics, but just making you more aware of certain facts. We all know that a strong relationship is based on love, trust and understanding. However, there may have been occasions, where you felt that your spouse was hiding things from you. Does that mean, he/she is cheating on you? Follow these tricks to get the right clues to your question.

1. Put on your ‘Thinking Cap’
You asked your partner a simple question ‘Why he/she comes late at home? And, there comes the most elaborate reply on it. Not just this, they are also ready with a solid alibi, with friends to back them up on this. Just Think, why your partner is trying to prove innocence over something so small? Also, honest people do not need their colleagues or friends to intervene on their behalf.

2. Listen carefully
If your partner is hiding things, then he/she will have a long, intricate story to tell you. A liar will go on and on giving unnecessary and unwanted details about the story. They will answer you in such a way that will leave no room for you to ask further questions. Now, here is the catch, if a person is honest, he/she will directly speak the truth. People who speak truth have no time to intricately weave in hundreds of little details.

3. Body language
We do not have control over our reactions as mostly our physical reactions come from our subconscious. So, when you ask something to him/her, the person subconsciously starts building words that would convince you the best. So, watch the facial expressions. Usually liars with their focus on cooking a good story are unable to hide their expressions which include
Fidgeting.
Starts scratching head.
Makes no eye-contact.
Grabbing a newspaper to hide face.
Switches on the TV.
Just give a careful look to above expressions, and you will see the hidden nervousness easily.

4. Ask the ‘Question’ again
Sometimes we have smart cheats around. They might get successful in convincing you with a story. To catch such people, after a period of time just ask your partner about the same details you asked before. This time you will see some inconsistency in the response. There will be new facts and different elements in the narrative. Watch out for ‘don’t you trust me?’ ‘Are you trying to say I am a liar?’, such lines are just to give you guilt traps, nothing else. Do not fall for them!

5. Actions needed on regular basis:
Check odometer: You can check this before and after the trip, to see, if the mileage correlates to where your partner says he/she has been.
Credit Card Details: Look for the charges of hotels, shopping, boutiques etc. Match the dates with the calendar to see, those items were bought for you or someone else.
Look at the Clothes: Is there a sudden change in his sense of dressing? Is she doing too much of lingerie shopping?

Many marriages and relationships fail due to infidelity. Remember, do not accuse your partner unless you have strong proof. Give your suspect a lot of scope and situations to make errors. There might be chances that your instincts are true.

6 Signs Your Boyfriend Is Losing Interest

If you feel that your boyfriend is not that much indulged in you relationships any more, here are the signs which will help you to confirm your fears.

1. He doesn’t pamper you with gifts anymore
In the early phase boys pamper their beloved with gifts and various tokens of love, without any reason. If your boyfriend has stopped giving you gifts and is not pampering you anymore with little knick knacks, it could be a bad sign that he is taking you for granted.

2. He forgets your birthday
It is a well-known fact that men are not good at remembering dates. But your birthday is one day of the year that you should expect your boyfriend to remember. If he has forgotten this date more than once, it is an obvious sign that his mind is occupied with something more important. No matter how much he apologizes, the fact that he has forgotten your birthday more than once is enough to tell you that he is drifting away.

3. His spends nights out more often than he dates with you
Does your boyfriend hang out with his friends way more than he does with you? Has he ever canceled a date with you just because he wanted to spend time with his friends? If he has, you should understand that he is losing interest in the relationship.

4. He looses his temper for no reason
Of course, every couple has fights and arguments occasionally. But if your boyfriend is losing his temper on silly matters on a daily basis for no reason, it could be an alarming situation. Maybe he is deliberately creating rifts between you both. Or he may also be losing his temper out of frustration of being stuck in a relationship in which he is not interested anymore.

5. He starts using ‘I’ instead of ‘we’
Couples who are in love with each other usually plan their future together. They tend to use ‘we’ instead of ‘I’ because they think about their life as a couple, not as individuals. If he started talking in first person of his feelings towards you, it could mean that he is already thinking only about himself, because he has lost interest in the relationship.

6. He seems generally uninterested and aloof
Little things and minute behavioral traits are enough to let you know whether he has any interest in your relationship or not. Compare your boyfriend’s behaviour to that one a few months back. If you find that he seems a lot more disinterested and aloof than before, he might have fallen out of love with you.

10 THINGS YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT LOVE

It Can be Hard to Talk About Love in Scientific Terms

The vision of love that emerges from the latest science requires a radical shift. I learned that I need to ask people to step back from their current views of love long enough to consider it from a different perspective: their body's perspective. Love is not romance. It's not sexual desire. It's not even that special bond you feel with family or significant others.
And perhaps most challenging of all, love is neither lasting nor unconditional. The radical shift we need to make is this: Love, as your body experiences it, is a micro-moment of connection shared with another.

Love Is Not Exclusive

We tend to think of love in the same breath as loved ones. When you take these to be only your innermost circle of family and friends, you inadvertently and severely constrain your opportunities for health, growth and well-being.
In reality, you can experience micro-moments of connection with anyone -- whether your soul mate or a stranger. So long as you feel safe and can forge the right kind of connection, the conditions for experiencing the emotion of love are in place.

Love Doesn't Belong to One Person

We tend to think of emotions as private events, confined to one person's mind and skin. Upgrading our view of love defies this logic. Evidence suggests that when you really "click" with someone else, a discernible yet momentary synchrony emerges between the two of you, as your gestures and biochemistries, even your respective neural firings, come to mirror one another in a pattern I call positivity resonance. Love is a biological wave of good feeling and mutual care that rolls through two or more brains and bodies at once.

Making Eye Contact Is a Key Gateway For Love

Your body has the built-in ability to "catch" the emotions of those around you, making your prospects for love -- defined as micro-moments of positivity resonance -- nearly limitless. As hopeful as this sounds, I also learned that you can thwart this natural ability if you don't make eye contact with the other person. Meeting eyes is a key gatekeeper to neural synchrony.

Love Fortifies The Connection Between Your Brain and Your Heart Health

Decades of research show that people who are more socially connected live longer and healthier lives. Yet precisely how social ties affect health has remained one of the great mysteries of science.
My research team and I recently learned that when we randomly assign one group of people to learn ways to create more micro-moments of love in daily live, we lastingly improve the function of the vagus nerve, a key conduit that connects your brain to your heart. This discovery provides a new window into how micro-moments of love serve as nutrients for your health

Your Immune Cells Reflect Your Past Experiences of Love

Too often, you get the message that your future prospects hinge on your DNA. Yet the ways that your genes get expressed at the cellular level depends mightily on many factors, including whether you consider yourself to be socially connected or chronically lonely.
My team is now investigating the cellular effects of love, testing whether people who build more micro-moments of love in daily life also build healthier immune cells.

Small Emotional Moments Can Have Large Biological Effects

It can seem surprising that an experience that lasts just a micro-moment can have any lasting effect on your health and longevity. Yet I learned that there's an important feedback loop at work here, an upward spiral between your social and your physical well-being.
That is, your micro-moments of love not only make you healthier, but being healthier builds your capacity for love. Little by little, love begets love by improving your health. And health begets health by improving your capacity for love.

Don't Take a Loving Marriage for Granted

Writing this book has profoundly changed my personal view of love. I used to uphold love as that constant, steady force that all but defines my marriage. While that constant, steady force still exists, I now see our bond as a product of the many micro-moments of positivity resonance that my husband and I have shared over the years. This shakes me out of any complacency that tempts me to take our love for granted. Love is something we should re-cultivate every single day.

Love and Compassion Can Be One and The Same

If we reimagine love as micro-moments of shared positivity, it can seem like love requires that you always feel happy. I learned that this isn't true. You can experience a micro-moment of love even as you or the person with whom you connect suffers.
Love doesn't require that you ignore or suppress negativity. It simply requires that some element of kindness, empathy or appreciation be added to the mix. Compassion is the form love takes when suffering occurs.

Simply Upgrading Your View of Love Changes Your Capacity for It

The latest science offers new lenses through which to see your every interaction. The people I interviewed for the book shared incredibly moving stories about how they used micro-moments of connection to make dramatic turnarounds in their personal and work lives.
One of the most hopeful things I learned is that when people take just a minute or so each day to think about whether they felt connected and attuned to others, they initiate a cascade of benefits. And this is something you could start doing today, having learned even just this much more about how love works.

8 Signs He Only Wants To Sleep With You

He only communicates via text messages or emails
We all know that guys hate talking on the phone, but if you’re never hearing the sound of his voice, that could spell trouble. “If I have hung out with a girl a few times and I’m still texting or emailing her, it’s just about sèx for me,” says Jake, 28. Chalk it up to his lack of interest in talking with you — and the ease of technology, a boon for lazy would-be players. He doesn’t need to engage in a real conversation — a couple of words here, an emoticon there, and he’s in touch with you with a bare minimum of effort. Keeping his communiques to emails and texts also allows him to steer the conversation towards s*x, either subtly or overtly; he can be more forward than he would be in person or over the phone since he won’t have to deal with rejection directly.

He warns you that he’s not relationship material
Some guys inform girls about their disinterest in a relationship early on with remarks like “I’m not ready for a serious relationship yet.” It can be easy to think he’s just being honest and may eventually come around after he’s gotten to know you. But don’t fall for it. “Some guys always have excuses as to why they can’t take the relationship to the next level,” says Sherry Argov, author of Why Men Marry Bitches: A Woman’s Guide to Winning Her Man’s Heart. “But ‘not now’ means ‘not ever.’” The upfront explanation makes it easier to break it off later. “When I just want sèx from a woman, I drop hints that I can’t be involved with her in a long-term relationship because my job is my number one priority,” says Matt, 31. “Then, when I decide to stop seeing her, I reference the fact that I said it wouldn’t work out early on.” Bottom line: If he says he’s not boyfriend material, know that he means it.

You’ve been to the same restaurant with him more than once in one month
Sure, he may say “It’s my favorite place,” “It’s our place,” or that he’s been craving the eggplant parmesan. As sweet as that may seem, his motives are likely not so romantic. A quality guy will put thought and effort into each of your dates — but a guy who just wants sèx will make the weekly Olive Garden dinner a preamble to taking you back to his place (which just happens to be around the corner). Watch out if he keeps meeting you in the same place and doesn’t vary from routine, Argov warns. “He’s with you at the little Mexican place, but with another girl at the Chinese place the next night and another girl at the sushi place the night after that.” He needn’t pull out all the stops every date, but beware night after night of the same thing. Says Argov, “A player will go for what’s quick, convenient and cheap — just like his intentions.”

He makes too many promises
It would be easy to avoid these guys if they said things like, “I want you to come over and have sèx with me — and then disappear.” Rather, guys try to woo you with what they think you want to hear. “If all he wants is sèx, he’ll promise you things you haven’t even thought of yet,” says Argov. “Men know that by talking about love, fabulous exotic vacations, babies, houses with the white picket fences, women will give up the goods. He’s fattening you up for the kill.” So if there’s lots of talk of big future plans very early in your dates, beware.

He only makes last-minute, late-night plans to see you
It seems obvious, but sometimes a guy can conceal the real intentions behind a booty call by making it sound innocent enough, citing how he’s working late or has dinner plans with friends — but that he really wants to see you. Then comes the clincher: a line like, “Can we meet for a quick drink, or maybe I could just stop by your place on my way home?” Sure, a little impatient enthusiasm is flattering, but if he’s truly into you, he’ll make plans in advance. Says Argov, “For the guy who’s smitten, the anticipation of seeing the woman he likes is as exciting to him as the date itself.”

He avoids getting-to-know-you talks
Everyone knows a relationship requires communication, especially at the onset. It should stand to reason, then, that a guy who plans dates that don’t give you a chance to talk to each other isn’t likely interested in a relationship. Says Todd, 35, “With girls that I only want to have sèx with, I go out to lots of movies — that way, I don’t have to talk to them. Afterwards I can justify going home with them since we did hang out and had an official date.” According to Mira Kirshenbaum, author of Is He Mr. Right? Everything You Need To Know Before You Commit, it should be apparent when a guy’s interested in getting to know you. “He may also be sèxually attracted to you and want to have sèx with you,” says Kirshenbaum, “but other things will have equal weight, such as having conversations with you about topics that you care about and interests you share.”

He’s pushy about getting physical
Some guys will say just about anything to get a woman to have sèx with him. Ever hear any of these lines?
“We’ll just cuddle.”
“You’re just so sèxy that I can’t help myself.”
“My underwear is chafing me.”

For the record: We hate just cuddling, we can help ourselves, and our underwear was fitting us just fine this morning.

He doesn’t introduce you to his friends
If you’ve been dating a month or more, and you still have seen neither hide nor hair of any of his coworkers, acquaintances, siblings or pals, he’s likely never going to bring you home to meet the parents. “I’ll introduce girls I’m genuinely interested in to my guy-friends within two to three weeks of dating,” Jake explains. “At that point I’m feeling comfortable enough with her to see what my friends think.” Don’t fret if you’ve passed the four-date mark and you haven’t yet met his mom, though. “Some men won’t introduce you to their families, because they’re embarrassed by them,” says Argov. Still, he should begin integrating you into his life within the first few months of dating. If not, it’s a sign that this guy’s into getting physical… and not much else. Consider yourself well warned!

11 Questions To Ask A Woman Before You Marry Her

So you love her, and you’re starting to see a future. How do you make absolutely sure she would make the right partner?

Here are some questions you should ask her before you pop the question.

Money
Ask her:
What would you do if you won N50,000,000 in the lottery?
You must find out her financial priorities.
One of the biggest problems couples have is money and, specifically, differences in styles of spending and attitudes about their budget. You’ll learn how she views money, saving, and long-term investing.
Will all of it go toward cars and trips, or most toward retirement? It’s not essential that you share the same investment strategies. What’s important is to use the conversation to prompt a discussion about financial behavior: how you pay bills, invest the year-end bonus, or decide on major purchases. If your attitudes don’t mesh, now’s the time to get the issues on the table and build a consensus.

Her Family

Ask her:
What’s your favorite holiday? How does your family spend it?
It’s important to learn about her family roots.
Where you spend the holidays can be a huge political issue. The underlying issue is whose family comes first, and that stands for who has the power in the relationship.

Religion
Ask her:
Do you believe in God?
This helps you find out how compatible your faiths and religious rituals are.
In a study of 120 married couples, those who shared religious holiday rituals reported more marital satisfaction than the pairs who practiced holiday rituals separately.
It’s not necessarily the religion itself that’s key—though the particular religion you practice can certainly be a huge issue with her family—it’s all the things that go with it. When you engage in celebrations and rituals, there’s usually a lot of planning involved, something to look forward to that’s meaningful to discuss.

Her Work

Ask her:
What’s your dream job? Where would you most like to live?
You need to know her goals, and how far she’s willing to go to reach them.
Just asking shows support for her career, an important factor. Those who felt they had more support had greater satisfaction than those who felt unsupported.
It’s also a good time to find out how far she’s willing to move away from her family. It’s a very under-appreciated area of stress—where are you going to live, whose family are you going to live near—yours or hers?.

Your Work

Ask her:
What was your dad’s work schedule like?
You need to find out whether she’s already lived with a man who had the same work ethic and schedule as yours.
Maybe her dad worked a 7-to-3 shift every day of his life, came home and played with the kids until they went to bed, and never worked weekends. Maybe he owned a business and set his own hours so he was always home for dinner.
But your job—or your future job—may require late meetings, 60-hour workweeks, and business trips. And that can put stress on a relationship.
“Working until 9, 10, sometimes later, night after night, is a constant source of stress with my wife,” a friend of mine in publishing told me. “She still doesn’t understand that this is the nature of the business at deadline time. It’s not the life she was used to.”

Interests and Dreams

Ask her:
How do you envision your life in 5 years?
This will help you find out whether she wants to be a career girl or a stay-at-home mom or a mom with a career.
You should know whether she expects to live in a big house or an apartment in the city. More and more research shows that the “opposites attract” notion is a myth. Successful couples usually have more similar priorities than not.
A couple has to have similar goals and a long-term plan, worked out together, to reach these goals. And, even more important, a similar tolerance for risk and sacrifice. If you don’t share the same values, they’ll be a constant source of conflict in terms of how you spend your time and money.

Discipline Style
Ask her:
What do you think of spanking as punishment?
You need to hear her thoughts on disciplining kids.
We assume you’ve worked out whether you both want children, and maybe even how many. (You have done this, right?) But how you’ll discipline them is a topic that’s often overlooked. Bring it up the next time you see an stubborn, unruly child at a restaurant. Ask her how she’d handle it and how she was disciplined as a child.
Either we tend to follow the way we were raised, or, if something was objectionable about the way we were raised, we do the opposite. Different parenting styles can cause the most strain on a marriage because they can be a daily, even hourly, source of conflict.

Genetics

Ask her:
What do your parents like to drink?
It’s important to know if there’s a history of alcoholism in her family.
Health problems like depression and alcoholism have a strong genetic component. If her mother had depression or her father was a chronic alcoholic, there’s a good chance it could creep up and become a problem.”
It’s not a relationship killer, but talking about hereditary health risks early will make it easier to discuss the same conflicts should they pop up in your relationship.

 Your Potential In-Laws

Ask her:
How have your parents reacted to your previous boyfriends?
You should find out whether they’ll think the current boyfriend is good enough for their little princess (and whether they’ll pay big bucks for the wedding).
If her parents don’t approve, there’s a potential problem,. Not that that’s necessarily a deal breaker. Who are you marrying, her or them?
What’s more important is to learn something about your girlfriend by how she responds. Is she the kind of girl who wants to please Mommy and Daddy? Or is she secure enough with herself to make her own life decisions?

Her Father

Ask her:
What was your relationship with your father like?
This helps you find out her attitude toward men.
Especially toward the one who mattered most (before you). If her father was distant and cold, she may seek male approval. If her father was abusive or a cheat, she may have trouble trusting men.
If there’s any unfinished business in her relationship with her father, it could manifest itself in your relationship. When people get into serious relationships, they tend to look to their mate to give them everything they need. Couples get into trouble when they don’t look closely at these tendencies early on.
You also should consider her relationship with her mother, which could have the very same implications. If she can’t pee without calling her mother to tell her all the details, that’s not going to change after you walk down the aisle.

And the Ultimate Question . . .

Finally, you need to ask yourself this: “Can I ask these questions and have an honest, intelligent conversation with this woman when we disagree?” Because if you can’t, none of her answers really matter.

Foods That Boost Fertility In Women

Want to increase your chances of conceiving? Here are foods that would do the trick -

1. Meat
Meat which is packed with iron is great for reducing the risk of infertility arising during the ovulation process. It also helps boost red blood cells while reducing the threat of anaemia which can lead to severe complications during pregnancies.

2. Nuts
Nuts of various varieties including almonds and walnuts which are rich in Vitamin E content heightens the female s*x drive while protecting the embryos from miscarriages.

3. Potatoes
It’s found that baked potatoes are rich in Vitamin B and E which enhances cell division, increasing the likelihood of a healthy ova being
produced.

4. Eggs
Eggs are an extremely small power-packed nutrition source that boosts fertility. It contains Vitamin B12 and folate which minimises birth defects. In addition, it’s rich in antioxidants and cartenoids which all boost fertility in women

Source: http://health.india.com/

THE UNTOLD PART OF ME

My life remains a mystery that I am yet to understand. Growing up was in between tough and easy. I was taught everything, including things I wish not to know.

I found myself in the ocean of players, guys who change ladies like T-shirts, and sex to them was like drinking water. A thirst I doubt they will ever get enough of. I knew all the techniques and principles of the best players. I knew all the lines and rhymes to woo a lady and get a YES at first attempt. I was told that love is used to comfort the weak and that real men don't fall in love.

I grew up feeling like a rat in the mist of cats. The more I knew how they do what they do, the more I dislike what they do. I found it difficult to picture myself deceiving or cheating a lady. I finally ran into people who feel the way I feel. People who taught me how to cherish and respect women. I taught my childhood was a waste till I heard Martin Lawrence say in one of his movies that “TO CATCH A THIEF, SEND A THIEF.” So I figured it out that I can actually use the same knowledge against them.

And I did, I started teaching people (especially ladies) how to find true love and know when they are being played. I also helped guys like me to get off the mind that love is for the weak. As I continued day by day, I felt fulfilled knowing that I helped someone avoid getting hurt to discovering true love in relationship. I got committed to fixing the emotional lives of others and felt happy as each one of them discovers true love.

But while I did all this, I never felt anything emotionally personal for any one of them except the passion of their pain and how I can help them through it. I was too committed to others and felt I don't need a girlfriend. The idea of falling in love with someone else aside God and what I do never came to me, at least not till that faithful day I ran into her. She had the tenderest and loving eyes I have ever seen. I promised to make her a perfect lady. I become dedicated to fixing all her short comings, and finally she was ready. I have transformed someone who felt rejected and had low self-esteem to an epitome of beauty. The perfect bride for any Godly man, and for the first time, I broke my own rule of ever falling in love with a client. I really had no choice, she has become spiritually, morally, emotionally, physically, financially, academically and socially ready for a mature and Godly relationship

I fell in love with my own invention or transformation as you would call it. I gave up almost everything to make her the best. All I wanted was to see her happy because her smile lighten up my world and gave life to everything dead in me. I cancelled trips and appointment she wasn't happy with just to see her smile. I gave her everything I have, I promise not to touch her till we walk down the aisle; I respected her body and feelings, I wanted to make her my first and last lady.

Well, I guess some things are only true in fairy tales. I found out that I have been fooled. She is a perfect girl, now she seeks the perfect guy. I spent my time, knowledge and money to make her ready, now she desires a finish work like hers. She now uses the very same information I taught her to deal with me. Finally it dawned on me how far we have become apart. I realized that she now travel at the speed of light with the some energy I gave her.

''Can they be right'' I asked myself, is love truly a comfort for the weak and lonely. But then, I have helped others find and I still see them together till date, even some which led to marriage with children. How was I able to fix the life of others and not fix mine? How could I know so much about love and still feel love is not for me.

I have seen doctors treat themselves, barber cut themselves and hair dressers make their own hairs .So I ask myself  , why can't I fix  my love life. Why should I feel I'm been played when I know the technique and rhythms of the best player.

All these questions ran through my mind as I woke up with her info on my head. I guess for now, I just have to go back and find fulfillment in what I was doing before I met her, and let God decide her fate. I wish her best of luck in all her aspirations.

For me, it was a new dawn, though it hurts and I am ashamed to admit it. She actually opened my eyes to a part of me I never paid attention to. I now know that God does some things to us to teach or to correct some things in our lives. We might think or never know we have them in us till God x-ray us and allow us to see the weak and broken bones in us. The x-ray might be difficult but the when he is done, we understand that it is all for our good .No wonder the bible says ''....there is a way that seems right to a man, but the end is destruction...'' Always allow God to show you His plans. You will see you were aiming too low.

TO BE CONTINUED

SPIRIT OF THE HEART

7 Ways Love Transforms Your Brain

Head over heels? Here’s what happens in our brains when we fall in love.
When we fall in love, we often think of the wonders it does to our heart and soul. But there’s another organ that’s deeply affected by your loving relationships: Your brain.

And it goes far beyond feeling emotions from sappy love songs, puppy dog eyes and Emoji heart-filled texts. When you’re head over heels for someone, some parts of your brain are activated, and others are switched off. That’s right, love, both romantic and parental, is actually altering the way you think.
Smitten with someone? Here’s how your brain is handling your romance.

1. You Feel Addicted
Ever hear that love is a drug? Well, there may be some truth to that. Your brain houses these intensely passionate feelings using the same system that’s activated when a person is addicted to drugs, from the euphoria you feel to your cravings for more. Sure, it might be a much healthier addiction — but let’s face facts, shall we? You’re an addict.

2. You Start Thinking In Twos
It’s not just “me, me, me” anymore. Now, there’s two of you to think about — and your brain will automatically pick up the changes. From birth, we’re linked to our mothers and much to scientists’ surprise, the connection transforms and changes with each relationship we have. The bond you share with your partner or children runs way deeper than just on the outside. A recent study linked using first-person singular pronouns (me, myself and I) to higher rates of depression than those who say “we” and “us.” More proof that healthy relationships are invaluable.

3. You Love Longer (And Become Wiser)
Falling in love is as good for your heart as it is for your mental heath. People in love report higher levels of dopamine, which is linked to pleasure, desire and euphoria. Studies report that people in positive, healthy relationships live longer, are happier, wiser and have better mental health.

4. You’re More Supportive
One of the biggest benefits of falling — and staying — in love is that you’ll learn what it’s really like to lean on (and support) another person. Building trust in a relationship is crucial. And, your brain helps you out with that. Through MRI scans, researchers have found that when we fall in love, the frontal cortex — the area of the brain that’s responsible for judgment — shuts down. So when we’re in love, we’re less likely to be critical or skeptical of the person we care about.

5. You De-Stress
Some of us might mistake those butterflies surrounding your first kiss — but there’s no way your brain will ever forget how it first felt to be touched by someone you’re in love with. Here’s the completely crazy part: in healthy relationships, holding on to your partner’s hand is enough to keep you from stressing, lower your blood pressure, ease your physical pain and improve your health. A healthy, encouraging relationship actually alters your brain function.

6. You Glow (Well, Your Brain’s Reward Centers Do!)
Wondering what the key to longevity is in a relationship? Scientists found it. In a study that assessed couples who defined themselves as “madly in love”, scientists found that the reward centers of their brains lit up after just looking at a picture of their spouse. In the calm and stress sites of the brain, researchers found a reduction in light up activity. Let the bright lines shine, baby!

7. You Feel Safe
Similar to the first bonds babies make with their mothers, the feeling of security will emerge in your relationship. As you age and change, your body actually remembers the brain cycles and stages that you went through in your youth — so when you feel reconnected to your baby self, those feelings of safety and contentment will come flooding back. Research also shows that when we feel love for someone, it shuts down the part of our brain that controls fear and negative emotions.

DATING....Are You Ready?

Young people all over the world, regardless of culture, share at least one thing in common: the challenge of growing into successful adults. Every society has its own customs in this regard, certain rites of passage through which its youth must navigate successfully in order to be recognized as mature, responsible men and women. In Western countries, one of the most common and socially significant of these customs is dating.

The word “dating” comes from the idea of “setting a date,” where two people (or more, if on a group date) agree to get together at a certain time and place for recreation and fellowship. Dating is an important vehicle in our culture for giving young men and women the opportunity to get to know one another in a socially acceptable manner.

Although dating as we know it today is not a Scriptural concept, it nevertheless has become thoroughly imbedded as a social norm. From a sociological standpoint, dating trends and practices indicate overall societal health, because the way people behave while dating usually reveals how they will behave when married. Habits and attitudes established during the dating years generally carry over into marriage.

One of the most common questions that parents and their teenage children ask is, “How old should a person be before dating?” The answer is not as simple as some try to make it. In reality, the question of when a young person is ready to date is very subjective, depending on the parents' attitudes and the developmental level of the child. There is more involved than simply assigning a chronological age. Adolescents mature at different rates, and girls usually mature faster and earlier than boys do.

Part of maturity is knowledge, and there are three principles or prerequisites that every person should meet before they begin dating. Knowing and applying these principles will help ensure dating success regardless of a person's status: younger, older, never married, or newly single again.

THREE PRINCIPLES OF DATING (Are You Ready?)

v  First of all, you are not ready to date until you are fully aware of both the benefits and the dangers of dating. Once you understand not only the perks but also the pitfalls of dating, you are mature enough to begin opening yourself up to more serious relationships.

The primary benefit of dating is the opportunity to get to know someone new, to build a new friendship with a member of the opposite sex. This is important for developing self-confidence and social interaction skills as well as for learning respect for each other as persons of worth, value, and dignity. At the top of the list of potential dating pitfalls is the danger of becoming physically and emotionally involved too quickly at too deep a level, leading to inappropriate behaviour.

Human beings are social creatures, and we relate to each other on three levels: spirit, mind, and body. To put it another way, we interact with each other in the spiritual, soulical, and physical dimensions. This progression is very important. Healthy relationships should always begin at the spiritual and intellectual levels, the levels of purpose, motivation, interests, dreams, and personality. The physical dimension is the least important of the three, yet that is where we usually start. Our Western culture has completely reversed the process. Everywhere we turn in society, the media, the entertainment industry, the educational system and even, many times, the church, the focus in relationships is on physical attraction first.

Healthy relationships should always begin at the spiritual and intellectual levels, the levels of purpose, motivation, interests, dreams, and personality.

Young people today face great temptations and are under tremendous pressure from every quarter to jump immediately to the physical in a relationship. Physical attraction leads quickly to deep emotional involvement and the couple hasn't even had a chance to find out whether or not they share similar interests, dreams, or views on life. By the time those things come out and they begin to discover that they are not on similar levels spiritually or intellectually, it is too late because they are already emotionally entangled, making it extremely difficult to break off the relationship. Too often they simply plunge ahead with their emotional connection, resulting in frustrated and unfulfilled life dreams.

Before you start to date someone you are interested in, ask yourself, “Am I aware of the benefits as well as the dangers of dating this person?”

           

The second prerequisite for dating readiness is a good understanding of God's standards for relationships. You need to learn or work out a clear set of guidelines for behaviours based on God's word, or you are not ready to date. This requires a certain degree of spiritual maturity. Waiting until you are in a dating situation to decide what is right or wrong or what you will or will not do is too late. Unless you settle those matters in your heart and mind beforehand, you will have little protection against temptation and could easily go too far. There are only two choices: either you will follow God's standards by deliberate choice, or you will follow the world's standards by default. Unless you plan ahead to keep yourself pure on a date, you probably won't. Our modern society has come up with some weird criteria for dating. Some say that a person is ready to date upon entering puberty, or upon becoming a teenager. The only criterion for a believer and follower of Christ is to find and follow God's standards. If you do not know what those standards are or what God's characteristics are for a balanced spiritual person, then you are not ready to date. Dating is no place for trial and error. You should not even begin to develop a serious relationship with anyone until you understand what God expects and requires. If you are not sure, find out first.

There are only two choices: either you will follow God's standards by deliberate choice, or you will follow the world's standards by default.

The third principle for preparing to date follows closely on the heels of the second. Once you have determined from Scripture what God's standards are, resolve in your spirit that you will not lower or compromise those standards for any reason, even if it means losing dates. Many people are willing to compromise moral or godly standards in order to get a date or to hold onto a boyfriend or girlfriend. That is immature behaviour and will cause a lot of problems. Standing firm on what you believe in is a sign of both spiritual and emotional maturity. There are no second-class areas of life to God. He is after your best. He wants you to obey Him, follow His Word, and stand firmly on His standards. Anything less and you cannot expect to receive His best.

Close attention to these three principles will help ensure that dating is a healthy and fulfilling experience both for you and for the persons you date.

YOU ARE READY TO DATE WHEN YOU DON'T NEED TO

If you feel that you “need” a date in order to be complete or fulfilled personally, you are not ready for dating. Need involves demand and implies that there is something lacking in life. The opposite of need is choice, which allows for a decision. A legitimate need eliminates choice.

Consciously or subconsciously, the quest to fulfill our perceived needs drives our lives and influences all our decisions. This is just as true with relationships as with anything else. As long as you perceive lack or incompleteness within yourself, every relationship you enter will be, to one degree or another, an effort to supply that lack or bring a sense of completeness. If you feel deficient, you will build your entire relationship on that deficiency, because you will be looking to the other person to supply what you do not have.

Most people enter relationships with some sense of incompleteness or inadequacy. What they usually end up with is a weak 50-50 relationship. Neither person can give 100 percent because they both are focusing on what they do not have, which they hope to find in the other person. People in this kind of relationship live every day in insecurity, because they each are expected to supply the other's lack, and neither knows how long they can keep doing it. The relationship may last only as long as either of them feels it is satisfying their needs or compensating for their deficiencies.

You are ready to date only to the extent that you feel whole and complete within yourself, apart from any other person (except God). When you regard dating as a matter of choice rather than necessity, you are ready. It is a matter of your ability to be happy and content whether you are with someone else or not.

When you regard dating as a matter of choice rather than necessity,

You are ready.

Consider Adam, the first man, as an example. The second chapter of Genesis shows us a human being who was whole, complete, and content within himself and his companionship with God:

(Consider Gen. 2:7-9,15,18-22).

Before Eve came along, Adam was alone, but he was not lonely. Loneliness is a spiritual disease. Adam was alone because he was the only one of his kind, but he was completely fulfilled as a person. In tending the garden he had meaningful work to do. Apparently, the thought never entered his head. Providing a mate for Adam was God's idea. Adam was completely self-fulfilled; he was ready for a mate when he did not need one.

It is the same way with dating. The time you are most prepared for dating is when you don't need anyone to complete you, fulfill you, or instill in you a sense of worth or purpose. You are ready to date when you have first learned how to be single.

When Am I Ready to Date?

ü  You are ready to date when you are fully aware of both the benefits and the dangers of dating.

ü  You are ready to date when you have worked out beforehand a clear set of guidelines for behaviour based on God's Word.

ü  You are ready to date when you have resolved in your spirit that you will not lower or compromise those standards for any reason, even if it means losing dates.

ü  You are ready to date when you don't need to.

ü  You are ready to date when you have first learned how to be alone.